Only, I don't usually flip the bird for no good reason.
Shit.
By the way...damn, that's a long finger. It's the size of my face. I always thought I had the potential to be a hand-model, but now I'm not so sure. I'm kinda like "Man Hands" on Seinfeld. Only, I'm "Long Fingers." Yikes....Case in point. I get distracted. Easily. This post is NOT suposed to be about middle fingers.
Yesterday in workshop, we got a little off topic. Prompted by one student's decision to use the word "pop" in a story, my other student's began discussing the use of "pop" versus "soda" versus (the rarely heard) "cola". It was actually a pretty intelligent conversation, despite the topic. We discussed possible reasons for the difference: regional differences, marketing, dialects, etc. I even brought up the fact that overseas (as far as I know) they say "Coke" for all soft drinks. The conversation developed further: "bubbler" versus "water fountain", "rest room" versus "bathroom", "ya'll" versus "yous guys." The point is, we got way off topic, and stayed off topic. As the teacher, I probably should have been more aware of the task at hand, but no, no, no. I am perfectley content to allow my mind to wander off -- far outside of the city limits, leaving all responsibilites and tasks to not get done at home. If this only affected me, that would be one thing, but as soon as I start playing my little flute during class like the Pied Piper for the workshoppers to follow, it's not a good thing. Pretty soon the hour is up and we're all in the middle of wheat field with about 200 miles behind us, separating us from the place we need to be.
This tick of mine not only affected my poor students, but generally dictates my life. Some examples: when I first got my guitar I did a pretty decent job of learning tablature, the easy way out of playing songs without having to really learn to read music. That got me through my formative months of reacquainting myself with the frets, the body, the sounds, the tender fingers, and so on. However, now that I have a pretty good idea of the sounds I can produce, that's all I do -- produce sounds -- try to put them together -- with no clue of what I'm doing. When I sit down with my (pretty kick-ass and expensive) chord book, I do a few strums, turn a few pages, but pretty soon I am leaned back on the couch just sliding my fingers up and down trying to piece together a good mash of made-up finger positions. I can do that for an hours. And I'm not learning anything because I never remember what the hell I did. Needless to say, learning the guitar is slow-going.
Example Number Two: Most days I arrive at work at 9:00 (rough, I know) but I never actually begin any work-related tasks until about 10-10:30. Why? Simple. If Denise is there, we chat. About nothing. About her godson, my crazy professor, the fact that it has snowed three gawl darn times already, and the work we both should be doing. If Denise is not there, I play on the computer: iTunes, McSweeney's, all the porn I can find (wink), and pictures of australian shepherd puppies. Or, if I happened to pick up a Reporter (school newspaper) on the way over, I read that. Every page. Every under-graduate caliber, fluffy, typoed page.
I could go on, but that would be boring. I suppose that as long as I don't allow myself to get distracted by really stupid things and have that affect really important things in my life or the lives of others, I'll be okay. Hmmm, that makes me think...kinda like the time back in '98 when the media went nuts over Clinton and Lewinski and fooled the American public into thinking that voting for a man like Bush in the next election would be a wise thing to do. See! There! I got distracted. Again.
